I knew our marriage was over last summer when I walked out of our house to stay at the Day's Inn. I think a part of me always knew, but I was in denial. I was in shock and disbelief that you would treat me the way you did.
But a part of me hoped, up until recently, that you would change. that you would begin to do right by me. That was foolish, I suppose.
It was foolish of me. At each and every turn you made it clear you loved me only for the things I could do for you. You insulted me and my contributions to our marriage just because I wasn't able to contribute much financially - which you always knew. You always knew that I was at a financial disadvantage compared to you. Now that we are going our separate ways, you offer me a pittance for the amount of trauma I've endured over the course of our marriage. I hate that you think you can throw money at your mistakes as if that would fix the harm you caused me.
I hate that I spend my time wondering how much you’ve told our mutual friends about our divorce - what kind of light you’ve decided to portray me in, what kind of fault you have assigned to me in our marital dissolution.
The only "fault" I take ownership of is not leaving you sooner for the sake of my well-being.
I loved you so deeply, once upon a time.
And now?
I love you no longer.
But a part of me hoped, up until recently, that you would change. that you would begin to do right by me. That was foolish, I suppose.
It was foolish of me. At each and every turn you made it clear you loved me only for the things I could do for you. You insulted me and my contributions to our marriage just because I wasn't able to contribute much financially - which you always knew. You always knew that I was at a financial disadvantage compared to you. Now that we are going our separate ways, you offer me a pittance for the amount of trauma I've endured over the course of our marriage. I hate that you think you can throw money at your mistakes as if that would fix the harm you caused me.
I hate that I spend my time wondering how much you’ve told our mutual friends about our divorce - what kind of light you’ve decided to portray me in, what kind of fault you have assigned to me in our marital dissolution.
The only "fault" I take ownership of is not leaving you sooner for the sake of my well-being.
I loved you so deeply, once upon a time.
And now?
I love you no longer.